The ultimate goal for permissive parents is to show their child love and feel their love in return. They tend to avoid conflict at any cost. In a permissive household, discipline and limits are often missing.
These parents are highly bonded and connected to their children. In their belief, the key to the heart of their child is to relate to them as a peer instead of as a parent. Rules in this household are inconsistent if they do exist at all. When they need a child to act on a rule or expectation, most often the parent will use any means necessary including bribery, gifts, food and other motivators to gain for their child to comply.
Children need to have healthy limits and expectations. The kids need to learn appropriate behavior to function as a member of society. They also have to feel valued and cared for. Often, children of permissive parents suffer self-esteem loss because there is no one to ask about their grades in school or help them with homework.
Children feel like an important part of a functional unit – the family unit – when they are held to a higher standard. To be part of that functional family unit, they need structured activities like chores and routine bedtimes. In their desire to be everything to their children, permissive parents often times miss the boat entirely and have very little to offer that a peer at school can’t also fulfill.
Permissive parents are better off trying for a more balanced approach because this does not work. A healthy part of parenting is having love and affection but it becomes unhealthy if there is an unbalance of guidance and discipline.